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Como convertirte en la persona que más odias en todo el universo

Paso 1: Pasar años preparando música para fiestas, editando las mezclas cuidosa y prolijamente y copiando cada uno de esos sets en prácticos cds intitulados con gloriosos nombres altamente representativos: Multitrack Pau 1: la entrada en calor, Dodifest 1, Poppunkelectro para la segunda hora, etcétera.

Paso 2: No bacapear esos cds (salvo un par, que obvio, son los que menos interesan) y guardarlos a todos juntos en un mismo porta cds.
Paso 3: Olvidarse el porta cd en la casa de una amiga y pasarlo a buscar especialmente por la casa de la suegra, que es el lugar donde la amiga se encuentra la noche en que son necesarios los cds porque hay una fiesta.
Paso 4: Tocar el timbre de la casa donde se hallan la amiga y el porta cds.
Paso 5: Recibir el porta cds en la puerta del edificio y subir al auto, ubicado en doble fila, a escasos 4 metros de la entrada.
Paso 6: Hacer una "parada técnica" en la casa de otra amiga para felicitarla por la mudanza y dejar el auto estacionado frente a la facultad de psicología ubicada en Yrigoyen y Esparza (no Sarasa).
Paso 7: En la puerta del edificio de la nueva amiga mudada, pensar: "¿y si mejor bajo la cartuchera de cds?"
Paso 8: Por fiaca, responderse: "naaaaaaa, total me quedo 5 minutos"
Paso 9: Al cabo de un rato, regresar al auto (que, a no confundir, ha quedado perfectamente cerrado y no ha sido asaltado, ni nada por el estilo).
Paso 10: Comprobar que el porta-cds no está en ningún lado.
Paso 11: Preguntarse: "¿Subí alguna vez al auto con el porta cds?" y contestarse "Sí. Tan boluda como para hacer dos pasos de la puerta de un edificio hasta el auto y perderlo, no puedo ser". Meditar, pues: "¿se me cayó al abrir la puerta del auto cuando hicimos la parada técnica?" y responderse: "y... es lo más seguro". Reflexionar: "entonces, si cuando pensé que debía bajar la cartuchera hubiera ido hasta el auto, habría comprobado que estaba en la vereda, o algo así" y arribar a la conclusión de que eso, probablemente, hubiese evitado el mal trago.
Paso 12: Llegar tarde a la fiesta con las manos vacías y lágrimas en los ojos.
Paso 13: Continuar toda la noche arañando conjeturas inútiles, porque, efectivamente, una ha perdido ese valioso objeto de la forma más ridícula posible y luego de unos instantes en los que la memoria no puede hallar la huella por donde los hechos transcurrieron, comienza a inventar los caminos más increíbles e imposibles (¿será que ahora llego a casa y está arriba de la mesa?)

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